Monday, June 15, 2009

Prepare Yourself!

I forgot to mention this, but I asked my therapist why she thought I got so upset at the graduation, and how odd I found it when my Dad disclosed he'd been so upset that entire day too. I told her we'd been through two of Mom's birthdays without her, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, etc. and we were more torn up on this day than any. I just didn't understand why.

Of course Dr. Eve had a brilliant response.

We prepared ourselves for those "monumental" occasions such as Christmas. We knew they were coming long before they arrived and we knew they'd be sad. We didn't prepare ourselves for this; it caught us off guard. We didn't deal with the feelings before hand.


Makes sense to me. Thanks, Dr. Eve.




1 comment:

madison said...

Isn't it great when you can make sense of something. Grieving sucks, but as we have or are learning, goes on for a long time. I think this is especially true of parents and spouses. Just think, parents are the only people we know for our entire lives, no matter how long we are together. Not only are you grieving your mother, but then there is the whole work thing. It seems you have lost a friend there, or at least a confidont(poor spelling, but you know what I mean) and you did nothing to make that happen. Remember her issues have nothing to do with you, it is her, and as much as I hate it, you can not change it.
You know we want to fix things, that is what we do, but this one is not yours to fix. I feel the same about your situation at the office, I want so bad to fix it and make you love it again, but I can't. what I can do is assure you that you will adjust and so will your people. You all will become closer, like it was for you at other branches. I think you would be wise to stop sharing your frustrations with your boss, it just makes you feel worse. but share with those who feel your pain or who have in the past. Remember others have been through this, or have been doing it for sometime and it doesn't make us better, we have just had the time to adjust.
I would like to think as we get older and hopefully wiser we would know how to deal with change better, but it seems to be just the opposite. Maybe it is all some kind of cruel joke! Don't we wish, I would like to have all of the answers but I have about as many as you do. Day by Day that is what we can do, and as successful as we have been, even with our issues we are going to be okay, cause that is what we do. Miss you, great talking to you today.