Sounded Like Two Beers

Today I stopped in the pet shop to buy a pound of gerbil food. As I was approaching the cash register I overheard the two girls who worked at the pet shop having a conversation. Actually, one girl was doing all the talking, the second girl was trying to work. It went something like this:

Girl #1: I called him.

Girl #2: Yeah? That will be $1.59, please.

Girl #1: I asked him how many.

Girl #2: Huh?

Girl #1: How many beers he'd had! He wouldn't tell me. But I can pretty much tell how many he's had just by his voice.

Girl #2: Okay.

Girl #1: Two. He's had two beers so far. I can always tell.

Girl #1 was a pretty little thing, not more than 20 years old. I instantly wanted to grab her and shake the shit out of her.

I wanted to say "Are you married to this guy? If you're not, you better run like the wind, girl"!!!!! You think you can count those beers by listening to his voice now? Wait about ten years! Wait til you've laid awake in bed tossing and turning, praying he'll pull in the driveway alive and in one piece. Wait til he HAS pulled in the driveway alive and in one piece and you greet him at the door and try to kill him! Wait til you devise a "formal rating system" for use with your best friend to tell her how drunk he was on a scale of 1-10. Wait til one day when you have to write a blog to heal yourself from the years of worry, obsession, and anger! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING?????"

But I didn't. I took my change and my gerbil food and left. I did say some prayers for her though.