I believe we are becoming a society that is increasingly disappointed and unfullfilled. And I believe that these feelings are self inflicted. It seems that we expect more and more for ourselves as well as from others, then when we don't get what we expect we are disappointed, even angry.
I've had a theory about this for a long time now. I call it "The Script". Often we have it written in our minds. It's a beautiful script. It's what we envision everyone around us, including ourselves, to say and do in a particular situation. There is one catch however....no one has a copy of the script but us. Therefore, when others don't know their lines, we become very frustrated.
Some of us have very high expectations. And as time goes by, we want more and more from people, particularly people on whom we are codependent. And when these people don't live up to our high expectations, we become hurt and even angry with them for not knowing their lines!
It's sad really. We can't be happy with what we acheive, or what we are given, because in our complicated minds, we always expect more. It's hard to let go of those high expectations, but if we can find a way to do that, we will find ourselves satisfied with ourselves, and content with what we receive from others.
A codependent person is one who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior.
The following two "Detach" journal entries will give you a crash course:
"An Answer to a Prayer" dated Nov 1, 2008 "How Did We Wind Up Here?" dated Nov 2, 2008
About This Journal
In 2008 I had the life changing realization that there was a name for what I'd always felt was "wrong" with me. After 20 years of thumbing through various self-help books. I learned about codependence.
I began writing this journal to document my journey out. Over time, it's evolved into something more. While I still talk about codependence (I know now, it will never totally leave me), this blog has turned into the thumbprint of my life; a therapeutic journal for me to sort out a lifetime of thoughts and memories. I believe in being honest with myself and others, and when something is bothering me, I reach out. With a support team of strong, smart women surrounding us, we can all continue to grow. I'm trying to live my best life, in pursuit of a Healthy Mind, a Healthy Body.