My Shrunken Head Collection

Today's session with Dr. Eve was great.

We discussed the breathing techniques I've been working on, and will continue to work on.

As I've mentioned before, I've been having assorted physical ailments related to my high stress level. The latest of these ailments was a series of migraines. The doctor who treated me for them suggested I talk to Dr. Eve about other relaxation techniques frequently used to treat stress without drugs, so we are embarking on some new ideas. These techniques are similar to yoga and require focus and concentration. We only took a baby step with this today so I'm sure there's a lot more to come, but the general idea is you learn to watch for signals like your eye twitching, your shoulders tingling, or your jaw clenching....even your fingertips or toes getting cold. When you identify these triggers you practice the techniques. Since the only stress relieving drug that seems to work for me is the highly addictive Xanax, I'm more than willing to give this a try.

My favorite thing I took from today's session was "Hit It Back". We all know I'm a "fixer". When I hear about a problem I feel obligated to fix it. Scarlett and my husband have both accused me of taking other people's sides when they tell me about an argument or dilemma they've had with a friend or coworker. Being the mediator I am, I seem to always try to rationalize to them why I believe the people they have argued with may be behaving the way they do. In my mind I'm not taking the other person's side, I'm trying to help! Essentially...trying to "fix". So Dr. Eve told me to imagine a game of tennis. She said when someone is telling me about their day, they are hitting the ball to me. The next step should be I hit it back. Instead, I catch the ball and begin to examine it. "This ball is dirty. And it needs to be restitched! I'm not sure this ball bounces the way it should!" It's not my job to fix something that doesn't belong to me or may not even need to be fixed. It's my job to let things bounce off me and hit them right back. That way I can use my energy to focus on issues of my own that I need to work on. Yet again....focus only on the things I can control; my weight, my stress, my own life.

There are a lot of reasons I try to analyze the ball instead of hitting it back. A lot of reasons. Part of my job at work is to mediate and solve problems. Part of my job as a Mom is to do the same. I just have to find that balance of when to catch and repair the ball and when to just hit the sucker back.