Sunday, October 4, 2009

I Should Have Listened To Mark


In order to finish the Chris W. story, I had to jump ahead a few years. Now, let's go back into time to fill in the missing pieces. I was a freshman at community college and finding myself available for the first time in awhile. I don't know why I didn't set my standards higher. I don't know why I didn't try to meet some smart student with a bright future, but I didn't. I had my eye on a maintenance man at campus. That's right....a maintenance man. I saw him driving around on his little cart every day and I thought he was a doll. He had big dimples, and twinkly eyes. I was smitten.

After awhile I got up the nerve to meet him. His name was David. He was the same age as I was and hadn't been employed there too long. David was a clown. He was always smiling and always making people laugh. He was very funny and very charming. There was just one problem....he was married. He had married his high school sweetheart immediately after graduation. He told me what a mistake that was, that everyone had tried to talk them out of getting married. He told me what a bitch she was and that he was miserable. I was 18 years old; I ate up every word of it.

I'll never forget sitting in my friend Mark's car one night. We were in front of my parents' house. Mark said to me "Mary....if he'll cheat WITH you, he'll cheat ON you". Mark begged me not to get involved with this guy. I didn't listen.

Less than a year after he'd married her, David was divorced from his young bride and dating me. I thought he was the greatest thing ever. He was handy and could fix just about anything. He could charm the pants off of just about anyone. He had the most wonderful parents and three great brothers. Before anyone could blink an eye I was part of his family.

David and I were married in October, 1983, less than two years after meeting. I was 19 years old and thought I knew everything. After all, my sister had been married at 17! I was two years older than that. I knew it all.

Things were like a story book for the first three years. We lived in a one bedroom apartment with a galley kitchen. We didn't need money, we had love. By now, my parents and my sister had grown very fond of David. All was right with the world until one day when I was making the bed in our apartment. I'll never forget it. I was just making the bed when suddenly I thought "Something doesn't add up. Surely he's not cheating on me?"

You've already read some of the stories about the things this man did to me. He would cheat and lie to me non stop for the next 4 years. It's funny--when I began writing the Mike Brown story and the Chris W. story I felt really different than I do tonight. I felt young and in love just remembering those stories. I cried alot while writing the Chris W. story--happy tears. But writing about my ex-husband, David is totally different. I don't feel warm and fuzzy at all. In fact, it's hard for me to write that I was head over heels for him. It's hard for me to type how good looking or funny he was because I can't stand the thought of him. He robbed me. David took alot of things away from me; mainly my trust in people. I feel bitter when I think of him.

Tonight I'll just stop right there in the bedroom, making the bed. I'll just stop with that life changing thought that ran through me head. Yeah....that's where I'll stop for now.

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