Last weekend my neighbor took her step daughter out shopping for a prom dress. They went to a local, family owned bridal shop near our home. Trying on formal dresses can be a big ordeal, so to make them comfortable, the sales girl helped my friend "set up camp" in one of the dressing rooms. She told them they could leave their purses in the dressing rooms and take their time shopping.
When they arrived home, my friend discovered $300 was missing from her purse. There was no question in her mind who took it. After two or three days of phone calls, the police became involved. It seems the woman who owned the shop has a drug addicted daughter. The woman broke down and told my neighbor that she was trying to help her daughter get back on the right foot and had been letting her work in the shop. The woman wrote a check to my neighbors and apologized emphatically. My neighbors said they walked away from the experience feeling the business owner was an upstanding woman just trying to run a small business, and help out her daughter. They felt very sorry for her.
Unfortunately the damage is done. Numerous posts on Facebook and tons of bad publicity via word of mouth, will probably cost this business owner a lot more than $300. I have to wonder how far the codependent mother will go to save her drug addicted daughter. How many chances will she give? How much money will it cost?
I can't stop thinking about that mom. I hope she'll do the right thing and attempt an intervention on the daughter. If that doesn't work, I hope she'll cut her off before she costs the lady her business, or something worse happens.
A codependent person is one who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior.
The following two "Detach" journal entries will give you a crash course:
"An Answer to a Prayer" dated Nov 1, 2008 "How Did We Wind Up Here?" dated Nov 2, 2008
About This Journal
In 2008 I had the life changing realization that there was a name for what I'd always felt was "wrong" with me. After 20 years of thumbing through various self-help books. I learned about codependence.
I began writing this journal to document my journey out. Over time, it's evolved into something more. While I still talk about codependence (I know now, it will never totally leave me), this blog has turned into the thumbprint of my life; a therapeutic journal for me to sort out a lifetime of thoughts and memories. I believe in being honest with myself and others, and when something is bothering me, I reach out. With a support team of strong, smart women surrounding us, we can all continue to grow. I'm trying to live my best life, in pursuit of a Healthy Mind, a Healthy Body.