Mary's MILFs

He really shouldn't be alive. He's snorted mountains of cocaine and drank barrels full of liquor. One night in a drunken rage he shot a bunch of chickens and burned down the hen house. He once woke up in the middle of a freeway.

Ozzy Osbourne has done a lot of messed up things in his life, but in true codependent style, I can't help but love him. I've seen him in concert many times and he never disappoints. Like many other artists, he's the quintessential showman; more comfortable on the stage than anywhere else.I watched every episode of his MTV reality series "The Osbournes" and I'm currently reading his book "I Am Ozzy", which is so over the top it has to be true. No one could make stuff like that up.

Despite his image as the "Prince of Darkness", Ozzy claims he was never a devil worshiper or an evil person. The Satanic stuff was a gimmic to sell records. Lots and lots of records. But he was dyslexic and ADHD in a time when no one knew what those things were. He has an extremely addictive personality and suffers from OCD. He's a hypochonriac and has worried incessantly about everything since he was a child. In order to cope and to succeed in life he felt he needed to be very drunk and very outrageous, all the time.

Ozzy is a huge, huge Beatles fan.

Photographs of Ozzy when he was young, like the one here with Black Sabbath always remind me of my first love, Chris W. (Ozzy's on the far right, all black). I like looking at photographs of Ozzy, particularly black and whites. He's got one of those faces that intrigues me.

Ozzy's sober now and living a good life. At 61 years old, he's still one of the coolest guys in rock and roll. His wife and his children are his whole world and I hope he lives a long, long time.

Congratulations Ozzy. Now you can add Mary's MILF status to your long list of achievements.

My Hero of the Week

If you don't know him, just Google him and read all about him; you'll find plenty of articles. He appeared on Oprah today. His new show, Food Revolution previewed last week and the first episode aired tonight on ABC. I'm talking about chef Jamie Oliver.

By now we've all heard the grim prediction that this generation of young people are the first generation NOT expected to have a longer life span than their parents. That's a frightening statement Eric M. Bost, Under Secretary for Food, Nutrition, and Consumer Services (FNCS) at the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) made in 2004.

Jamie Oliver wants to change the way our children are eating, and it starts with the food they get at school. He's been successful at this in England, and now he's bringing his revolution to the fattest, unhealthiest country in the world, and the unhealthiest city in that country, Huntington, West Virginia, USA.

Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution airs Friday nights on ABC. As a parent, the first two episodes were both frustrating and alarming. I watched in horror as children at school were served pizza and sugary cereal floating in chocolate or strawberry milk for breakfast. My 12 year old son tells me he eats doughnuts and sausage wrapped in a panckake served on a stick like a corn dog, and chocolate milk for breakfast at his middle school.

I'm not sure what it's going to take to turn this ship around. Frankly, I'm not even sure it's possible. It's cheaper and much more convenient to heat up a box of processed meat and potato beads than to prepare real chicken and peel potatoes. And let's face it, the kids like eating the junk food. It's what they know and what they are used to. The first graders on this episode couldn't even identify a tomato or a potato, but they sure knew what chicken nuggets and french fries were!

I can't wait to tune in each week to see how this progresses. Right now, Jamie is hitting wall after wall after wall. Right now, Cheap and Convenient are winning.....bigtime.

Striking A Balance

Tonight it is necessary for me to talk about "detachment"; an important word in this blog. It's not the first time I've discussed it, but I'm in a situation right now where I feel like I'm separating myself so far away from something that I'm to the point of being rude and insensitive. I need to get myself back on track and in a healthy place. I'm searching for that happy medium. So I'm dragging out my copy of "Codependent No More" and reading up on the subject.

First, let's discuss what detachment isn't. Detachment is not a cold, hostile withdrawal; a resigned, despairing acceptance of anything life and people throw our way; a robotic walk through life oblivious to, and totally unaffected by people and problems; a Pollyanna-like ignorant bliss; a shirking of our true responsibilities to ourselves and others; a severing of our relationships. Nor is it a removal of our love and concern, although sometimes these ways of detaching might be the best we can do, for the moment.

Ideally, detaching is releasing or detaching from, a person or problem. We mentally, emotionally, and sometimes physically disengage ourselves from unhealthy and frequently painful entanglements with another person's life and responsibilities, and from problems we cannot solve, according to a handout, entitled "Detachment" that has been passed around Al-Anon groups for years.

Detaching does not mean we don't care. It means we learn to love, care, and be involved without going crazy.
-Melody Beattie, "Codependent No More"

That's exactly what I needed. Let me think on that for awhile.....

Cheaters

Almost every night when you turn on the television you hear it. Tiger Woods, John Edwards, Jesse James....you know what I'm talking about.....cheating, married men. They're on the telly crying their eyes out, begging their wives, and America, for forgiveness. So this has me thinking. Do men really cheat more than women?

A quick Google search reveals there are a lot of opinions on that subject, and most of them are conflicting. Some say men cheat way more, some say it's about even, and a few even suggest women may be the more deceitful of the two. Now I know this is going to be a little controversial, and I've said before in my blog, cheating is never a good idea because someone always gets hurt, but for what it's worth, here's my opinion about who cheats and why.

While I do think men cheat more than women, I don't think the numbers are as skewed as Entertainment Tonight and Extra would have us believe. I believe women cheat plenty; I just think they are smart enough not to get caught as often. You see, I believe men and women cheat for different reasons. Men cheat for the thrill of it. Often they can't resist a young, beautiful, fertile woman. They can't really help it; it's nature. But cheating in this way is a bad idea, because young, beautiful, fertile women tend to fall in love with the married man. And they eventually want him all to themselves, so at some point the affair will be exposed; you can bet on it. By the time that happens, the men have gotten so sloppy, they've left a trail of evidence a mile wide. All the mistress has to do is uncover it all and she thinks her man will be hers for the taking.

I believe women, on the other hand, cheat for a different reason. Women cheat because they feel unappreciated or unloved by their husbands. They don't typically have to worry about being exposed, because the men they pick don't usually have any intentions of stealing them away. Let's face it; the hot, Latin pool boy probably does not want to start a family with the rich, lonely cougar. Even the married man from the office who's been filling his coworker's coffee cup once a week, doesn't plan to leave his middle aged wife and kids for a different middle aged woman with kids...who don't even belong to him!

Also, women are more patient, and don't make the clumsy mistakes men make. They don't leave a string of incriminating text messages, emails, and voice messages for their husband to find. They cover their tracks much, much better because they think about what they are doing; they are more shrewd and cunning. I believe women to be much more devious than men.

Men are impulsive and act before they think. Women are much more patient and they think before they act. That, my friends, is why the Jesse's, Tiger's, and John's of the world will always be the ones making headlines. To quote a favorite movie of mine, "If you are gonna have affairs, you have got to be more careful!".

What's For Lunch?

It's Sunday, and that means lots of things. Scarlett will come by today for some R&R time, my mother-in-law, Cher will most likely come for Sunday dinner, and later this evening many of us will start packing lunches for the coming week. As we pack our lunch pails with quick and easy Lunchables, Lean Cuisines, and other ready made foods, let's think about what we are putting in our bodies. The following is an expert from an article I read from author, Michael Pollan:

For the last 30 years and more, something has been disappearing from the American diet. Its absence, has led to widespread obesity, diabetes, and ill health. The name of the missing ingredient--food. Real food, that is, the kind that our great-grandmothers might be hard-put to find on a visit to a modern supermarket. Real food, is the simple answer to our present, dire dietary state of health.

"Most of what we are consuming today is no longer, strictly speaking, food at all," Most of what we consume has been remanufactured by the food industry into some form of "food product" (generally identifiable by having more than five ingredients or ingredients that are unpronounceable).

Let's face it; we're all pressed for time. Convenience is nice, maybe even necessary. But as you're packing that lunch tonight, consider substituting a piece of fruit in place of a snack cake, consider whole grain breads in place of white, and if you usually run through a drive thru for a quick breakfast, why not pack some (no sugar) cereal and a container of low fat milk instead? Trust me, you'll be just as full, and you'll save yourself hundreds of empty calories.

We've got one body; that's it.

Not By The Hair of My Chinny Chin Chin

Remember the Three Little Pigs? I love that story. The wolf came knocking on the door of the pig who built his house of straw. Of course the pig didn't let him in, but the wolf huffed and puffed and blew his house in. Then there was the second pig. He built his house of sticks. The wolf knocked. The pig wouldn't let him in, but the wolf huffed and puffed, and blew his house in too.

In my life, that's how it's always been when it comes to codependence. I heard the problem knocking, and I resisted opening the door, but in the end my structure was so weak that the big, bad wolf was able to blow my house down anyway.

Right now there are a couple of codependent situations in my life that are beating on the door. "Hello, it's me! Why don't you start incessantly worrying about me? Why don't you start focusing all your efforts at fixing me? Why don't you try to figure this one out?!?". Yeah, I'm aware that the wolf is out there, I saw him through the peep hole; and I'm cautious. But I'm certainly not going to open the door. And huff and puff as he may, I'm not overly concerned. Why? Because I'm pretty sure that right now, my house is built with bricks, and I'm going to be warm and cozy inside, taking care of myself, eating right, and exercising.

Healthy mind. Healthy body.

Fantastic Foods

I never thought I liked blueberries. After all, blueberry Kool-Aid made my mouth and tongue turn blue. Besides, cherry was always better. MUCH better. I never liked the blue popsicles or the blue Jolly Ranchers either. Seriously...up until last Fall, the closest I ever came to eating blueberries was the dried imitation pieces found in blueberry muffin mix.

Let's be honest...I simply never tried them. Last Fall I made a commitment to myself to start eating healthy foods. I noticed that blueberries were constantly showing up on my Biggest Loser meal plan, and I'd been hearing how nutritious they were. One day I was at the grocery store and noticed they were on sale so I bought a package. I've been in love ever since.

Half a cup of blueberries goes a long way. Sometimes I just measure them out and eat them all by themselves. I love to toss them into my breakfast cereal and milk. They taste great in Cream of Wheat and oatmeal, and they are the perfect alternative to maple syrup when you have pancakes. Two small pancakes with fresh blueberries rolled up inside is a great treat; and you don't have to feel guilty (or bloated) afterward.

One half cup of fresh blueberries contains 41 calories and zero fat. Blueberries contain antioxidants and some studies suggest they may possibly having a role in reducing the risks of some diseases,including inflammation and certain cancers. Anyone who knows me knows I constantly have inflammation somewhere in my body, so this is an added bonus! "It all connected."

In the coming weeks we'll be talking about more Fantastic Foods. In the meantime, buy a carton of fresh blueberries next time you're at the market (organic, if you can find them). You'll see what I mean. "Blueberry" isn't just a blue chemical that flavors sugary candy--blueberries really do exist! And they are delicious!