Strange Magic

Strange, but it is hard for me to enjoy Christmas decorations before Christmas.

There is always such a mad rush to get everything done. Shopping, cooking, visiting.  It's not until after Christmas that I can sit down in peace and enjoy the beauty. 

My Mom

Sometimes it's hard for me to remember my mother. At least it is hard for me to remember her when she wasn't sick. But if I really think about it, I can indeed remember. 

I remember the fiery, feisty, strong-willed, beautiful woman that she was. I don't ever want to lose those memories of her. I don't ever want to let them die. 

Tonight is the first time I've cried for her in awhile. Sometimes I just really wish I had that strong woman here with me, on my side.   It just seems like things would be so much easier.

Especially at Christmas and my birthday...I miss her.

Too Tired To Think

Wow… No posts since November 18. What can I say? Thanksgiving....Holidays... 

My dad seems to require my help more and more. Work has been demanding. I still have a rash. Periods of depression. 

Stress of daily life takes its toll on me sometimes. I don't even know when I am trying to say tonight.